the more i have time on my hands, the more i don't have an excuse to finish off (actually, start) my papers. so what do i have to do? to remind myself, let me just write it down: 1) five papers for my INC in an anthro subject (ten pages each)--i have actually written down some tiny points for each paper; i'm just too effing lazy to take it seriously and WRITE. time passes by and i slowly forget what the topics were. so 2) reread the darn topics. 3) maybe watch Kubrador again for the third (or was it fourth?) paper. 4) research, research, research. i have a gun but no bullets. a camera with no film. a topic without related literature. again, my laziness. youngest MA (then of course, PhD) holder? good luck with that, then. am such a wimp. 5) i need three articles for saturday. i have to deconstruct at least one of them. how do i do that if the libraries are closed? if i can't access one through the Net without paying 25 dollars? if my mom is against giving credit card numbers online? if i don't even have my own credit card? if i am so depressingly broke? no offices mean no paycheck, and no paycheck means...
and what if the car breaks down again, starter all choked in floodwater?
gas runs out in the middle of traffic, in the middle of torrential rain?
i go hungry, and there's nothing in the dash except worn-out batteries?
munch. munch. munch. alkaline leaves such a bitter aftertaste.